


Nightmare Of The Dales

by xKeeperLavellanx



Series: The Dales [1]
Category: Dragon Age: Inquisition
Genre: F/M, Fear Demons (Dragon Age), Therinfal Redoubt
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-10-10
Updated: 2016-04-04
Packaged: 2018-04-25 18:34:01
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 3
Words: 7,952
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4971832
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/xKeeperLavellanx/pseuds/xKeeperLavellanx
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>There were things about Therinfal Redoubt the Inquisitor did not want to relive, things she forbade Varric from writing about - but for better or worse he wrote them anyway. (Picks up at the start of Champions of the Just with a plot twist throughout)</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Prologue: Therinfal Redoubt

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for visiting this fanfiction, I hope you enjoy what is to come. This first chapter is a basic run down of the start of the Therinfal Redoubt quest adapted to my Inquisitor to help smooth the flow into the coming chapters. Enjoy.

Therinfal Redoubt was sturdy, intimidating and well constructed to stand against the ages; the vast fortress loomed over the Herald and her group as they approached the draw bridge, which was littered with the nobility whom had come to aid their progress.

Andraste's Herald, Artemis Lavellan, was a cautious mage with lustrous auburn hair and piercing emerald green eyes; her vallaslin framed her face like rippling ocean waves and made her appear far gentler than she truly was.

In the few weeks and months since falling from the Conclave Rift, her trust had been gained by her inner circle, and where she had once been hard and suspicious towards humans she now counted a few among her friends.

As she approached the draw bridge, a particularly finely dressed human met her and introduced himself as Lord Esmeral Abernache – he was much too pompous for her tastes but to the best of her ability she remained civil as he accompanied her party inside the fortress.

Being a mage, she was somewhat unnerved by the mass of Templars around her, but nevertheless she was confident she had chosen the correct set of allies; while the mages would have made fine company Commander Cullen had been correct to point out they were at risk of demonic possession. The Inquisition could only afford to face so many enemies at once, and having them appear from within their own ranks would be problematic.

Appearing at her side, Solas shuddered as he glanced around, "Do you feel it, Lethallan? The purging of magic in the air, its almost potent enough to taste it..."  
"I do feel it," she answered, her voice soft as she gazed at her fellow Elf, "Ir abelas, Solas, it is not to late if you wish to return to Haven, I am sure this is very unpleasant for you."  
"No more so than it is for yourself, I would imagine." his lips quirked upwards faintly, "I will stay, the feeling is not so strong to chase me from my purpose."  
"Ma serannas." she uttered with a smile.

Her group came to a stop in front of the final gate standing between them and the courtyard to the fort, and a young dark skinned Templar seemed to brighten in mood considerably at the sight of them, instantly pushing between the nobles to greet them.

Artemis recognised the young man from Val Royeaux and stepped forward to meet him, "It is good to see you again."  
"Not as good as it is to see you, Herald. I am Knight-Templar Barris, please come inside... But... Be wary, something is not right here." he murmured, his voice was quiet and he was clearly worried about someone overhearing him.  
"What do you mean, what is wrong?" Cassandra asked as she came up alongside the Herald.  
Hesitating for a moment, Barris glanced towards the courtyard behind him and then back at their honoured guests, "Seeker Lucius asked for the Herald, by name. Before today he cared nothing for what was happening outside of our walls, but the moment the nobility showed up he became obsessed with meeting you. Add to that his actions in Val Royeaux... He is acting very strangely. I do not like it."  
"Try not to worry, we shall see what is happening here." Artemis' voice was stiff, but confident at the same time.  
"My thanks, Herald."

With that, the young Templar turned and guided them into the yard beyond, where many Templars and nobles were also gathered, scattered here and there with no clear formation or order. She couldn't help but notice the stares she got, from noble and Templar alike, some bitter other curious.

Barris came to a stop beside three flag posts, she could clearly see the flags, labelled for the People, the Chantry and the Templars. What in the Creators names was this about?

"I apologise... Lord Seeker Lucius requests for you to perform this ritual, you see the three flags, it is a time honoured tradition for... Important guests to raise the flags in order of importance to themselves. Will you partake?"  
"Asking us to do such pathetic tasks? I thought I knew your name, Barris, yes the second son if I am not mistaken. I know your family young man-" Lord Abernache began to speak, his tone very condescending.  
"I will partake of the ritual, if the Lord Seeker wishes it." the Herald spoke over the annoying noble, giving him a severe glare which silenced him in a heartbeat.

Turning from them, the young Elven woman moved closer to the flag controls and considered her choices. In truth neither the Templars, nor the Chantry meant anything to her; in terms of the people... She had seen enough death already and wanted to prevent more, so she determined that the People meant the most to her. After a few moments of contemplation she raised the flags.

"The People, the Templars, the Chantry..." Barris murmured a he watched her, "Would you explain your reasoning?"  
She turned to him with a raised eyebrow, "My, my the Lord Seeker is a nosy bastard is he not?" she heard Cassandra make a choking sound of shock but paid no mind to it, "My reasons are my own, and they shall remain that way. Now, take us to the Lord Seeker."

From there, they were taken across the yard and into a spacious room with poor lighting and a few scattered tables; as the door closed behind them Artemis saw a small gathering of Templars approaching them, though soon noticed Lucius was not among them.

"Well... This looks like a friendly gathering." she commented dryly.  
"Knight-Captain Denam?" Barris frowned in confusion and glanced around at the other higher ranked Templars.  
The man addressed snorted, "You were expecting the Lord Seeker... He has sent me to die for you," he cast his helmed gaze around the room, "So, this is the alliance the 'Inquisition' offers the Templars? Pitiful... A group of lapdogs and porcelain dolls who would shatter at the merest glimpse of the real world. Truly, your effort are... Pathetic."  
The Elven woman prickled at his tone of voice, noting from the corner of her eye how Barris seemed tense, "Knight-Captain, I am expected by the Lord Seeker, I would not have our meeting delayed any longer. Where is he?"  
Of course, Abernache had to comment as well, his dulcet tones making her skin crawl, "Yes, I too would like to extend the warm hand of cooperation, to the most gracious Lord Seeker Lucius. Where is he, Denam?"  
"Open your eyes man, and move away." Cassandra said sternly, she too saw the odd behaviour.

The nobleman looked around, clearly unimpressed by her manner of addressing him, however before he could add his next comment, Artemis grabbed him by his shirt and yanked him back into the folds of their group, and the Templar persisted.

"All of his plan were ruined the moment you arrived with your damned purpose, its created chaos among the ranks, ranks that were supposed to have been changed already! Now we have no choice but to purge those questioning our actions... Such a waste. And you," he pointed at the Herald, "It is all your fault, you filthy knife ear!"

The Herald had no time to respond before an arrow soared through the air and whistled past her ear, she looked around and watched as Abernache crumpled to the ground, the arrow sticking out of his expensive looking hat; as her gaze lifted again she watched in a mix of shock and dismay as the Templars in the room began unsheathing their swords and their daggers, a dull red glow emanating from their armour.

Another arrow whistled towards her and she was narrowly saved when Solas froze the projectile; and she swiftly began casting spells at the attacking Templars. In her peripheral vision, she saw Barris standing with them against his own people, and her respect for the human grew a little.

"THE ELDER ONE IS COMING! AND NO ONE SHALL LEAVE THERINFAL WHO IS NOT STAINED RED!" a yell came from the Knight-Captain as he lunged across the table towards Artemis, only to be smacked in the face by Cassandra's shield as she ran forward into a defensive stance.

The room was filled with the sound of fighting, which mimicked what was happening outside a well; the young elven woman stood beside Solas as they covered each other's backs and continued throwing their strongest spells at the Templars, knowing that any less than that could result in the use of a magic purge talent.

With Barris's assistance, and the barrage of attacks from Cassandra and the Iron Bull, they managed to put down the crazed Templars before any more blood could be spilt. Artemis stalked over to the motionless body of Denam and crouched down, roughly yanking off his helmet and glaring at his ugly face, covered in thick red veins and dark spots.

"Well, he is alive, Bull pass me a poultice, I want to take this one back to Haven alive for questioning." she muttered.  
"I would question the Lord Seeker about this... This... Elder One." Barris added, "This makes no sense to me..."  
"Oh don't worry, you will have your chance." she got to her feet once she was sure the Templar would survive and gave him a sharp kick to the head to ensure he remained unconscious, though it was partly to do with her own revenge for being called a 'knife ear'.

The group hurried through the hallways, encountering only a few straggling Templars along their way as they hastened to find the Lord Seeker. The sounds of ongoing battle echoed loudly from all directions, and she found wondered just how many would be slaughtered standing for what they believed to be right.

She grabbed a few bags of gold as she found them, as well as a few odd pieces of armour here and there, before they ascended a short stair way and exited into another courtyard. Instantly, they were under siege from more Templars, all of which had that same dull red glow from their armour, they fought their way through, though it was a rough fight.

Artemis felt the sting of metal against her skin and spun on the spot, staggering back as blood seeped down her arm; she bit her tongue and threw her hand out, a jagged spear of ice impaling her attacker through the skull before she lurched back towards the rest of her companions, helping them finish off the Templars in the courtyard.

"This is insane, listen to the fighting... This goes against everything Templars are supposed to stand for." Cassandra breathed, her grip tighter than usual on her blade, "We should hurry, perhaps there is time for us to stop more blood shed."  
"Agreed." the Elven woman glanced around and looted a couple of bodies, pocketing gold and supplies before she then checked her arm where the bite of the air stung her fresh wound.  
"It does not seem life threatening." Solas murmured as he too looked at the wound, "You should bind it however, to prevent further blood loss."  
"Agreed." she said again, tearing a strip of cloth from her shirt and using it to wrap tightly around the wound, tying it with her teeth she was sure it would serve its purpose, "Barris, where is the Lord Seeker most likely to be hiding?"  
"If I were to hazard a guess..." he turned and looked at the main focus of the building, which could have passed for a cathedral or a chantry, "Probably up there."  
"Perfect..." she grumbled and moved on.

They encountered several more groups of enemies, now dubbed Red Templars by the group, and hurriedly dispatched them, getting more familiar with their style of fighting and adapting their own to combat it more effectively. Cassandra's knowledge of Templar strategies also helped a great deal, and thanks to her they were able to better prepare for each wave of enemy.

As they moved every closer to the main construct, they helped a few regular Templars who, like Barris, remembered their duties and had attempted to prevent further bloodshed. However, it became clear the further they got, that those Templars were increasingly menial compared to the mass of Red Templars.

Jogging up a set of stone stairs, Artemis suddenly stopped and staggered, leaning against the wall for support as a cold scaly voice rippled through her mind, taunting and jeering at her; it was like a choke hold around her throat squeezing tighter by the second, grappling for the very air in her lungs. Her body stiffened and she felt like she had fallen into an icy lake. Then the feeling was gone. As quickly as it had come, it had left again, leaving her tense and uncertain as she forced herself to continue forwards, ignoring the concerned voices of her companions.

By the time they reached the yard in front of the main building, Artemis' hands were shaking, she could feel a dark presence ahead, the like of which she had never experienced before. It was suffocating like a thick blanket and she found herself shuffling closer to Solas again.

"Do you... Feel it?" she asked, her voice barely above a whisper.  
"I do." he looked around them cautiously.  
She licked her lips uncertainly, "Have you... Ever felt anything like this before? Or come across anything in the Beyond like this?"  
"I have, once, it was an experience I would prefer not to relive..." he hesitated, "Be wary, Lethallan, this creature is not one to be toyed with."

She wanted to question him further, but stopped when she saw the figure of the Lord Seeker at the top of a final flight of stairs; her eyes narrowed slightly and she slowly ascended, taking her time to appraise the man's turned back. The Elven woman half believed it would be best to slit his throat while he was unaware, but she knew Cassandra would never forgive her for it.

Instead she slid her staff into the hold on her back and moved forwards, tilting her head slightly as she reached out to touch the man's shoulder; letting out a surprised gasp as he twisted around and gripped the lapels of her robes and pulled her towards him.

"At last."


	2. Thought, Feeling and Self

Artemis hit the floor hard, coughing and shivering as her body was enveloped in cold air, she curled up in a tight ball and tried to come to terms with her new surroundings. It could have been hours she laid there, before she finally found the strength to push herself to her feet; when she did she found herself in an eerie hallway, crumbling pillars and thick fog surrounded her, she could barely see a few feet in front of her. Looking around desperately, there was no sign of her companions, of the Templars, or of Lord Seeker Lucius. Her mind buzzed with confusion and she wrapped her arms around herself, trying to shut out the cold.

The elven woman padded forwards through the fog, the only sound to be heard was the crunch of her footsteps against the dirt floor, then through the smog she began to see flames, and the closer she got the more recognisable they became, though the sight sent a prang of fear into her heart. The forms of dozens of burning corpses met her sharp eyes, her mouth went dry as she looked at each of them in turn, wondering who they were and why they were there with her. 

The coldness bit at her constantly and she shuffled forwards between the corpses, being careful not to bump into any of them out of respect, she slowed as she saw two upright figures ahead and sped up a little, her eyes widening in surprise.

“Cullen? Josephine?” she called out, “What are you doing here? Where are we?”

A frown formed as neither of them looked at her, or addressed her, simply staring into space like she wasn't even there, however, her gaze was captured as a gasp echoed from behind them, and Leliana approached from between the two. She took a step away from the leaders of the Inquisition, feeling daunted and discontent by their expressions.

“Is this form helpful? Will it let me know you? Learn you? Echo you?” Leliana spoke, but it was not her voice, it was the same sickly, scaly voice from before and it sent a shiver down her spine, “Everything tells me about you. Even this... Watch.”  
Artemis reached out to stop her as she dragged a knife across Cullen's throat, blood spattering her face as she did so, “Stop it! What are you doing?!” she exclaimed, watching the blond man crumple to the floor, “By the Creators...”  
“Stop it! What are you doing?!” Leliana mimicked before disappearing among the shadows.

Artemis took a few steps back, her breath hitching as Josephine seemed to come alive, stalking towards her like a predator after its prey, “Being you... Will be much more interesting than being the Lord Seeker. Do you have the slightest idea what the Inquisition could become? Of course you don't you are blind! But you shall see, I am going to show you. I am going to show you the true meaning of power.”

She was gone in a flash, Artemis was left spinning on the spot, looking for where she might appear from next, her breath hitching before anger flared in her chest, “You think you will take the Inquisition from me? Think again you fool... You are nothing more than a demon. I have faced demons before and lived to tell the tale! You shall be no different!” she barked into the silence, balling her fists tightly.  
“I am no toy to be cast aside by a childish mage!” the watery, changed voice of Cullen erupted from behind her, making her jump and flinch away slightly, “I am Envy, and I will know you! I will know the way you think, the way you feel, I will know you, Herald.” he spat, turning and coming so close to her she could feel his breath on her face.  
“I will not fear you.” she breathed, “No matter what you do... I will not kneel to a demon. Not in this life, nor the next!”

The Cullen impersonator seemed to grow frustrated, pushing away from her with a growl, “You will tell me what I want to know! Tell me what you think. Tell me how you feel.”  
“Never.” she snarled, before her eyes widened as she saw a discoloured twin of herself staggering towards her, keeling over dead, and a dagger in her own hand. She dropped the blade and her eyes darted around for some explanation of what was happening, but she was alone again.

“By the Creators what is this hell?” she breathed, glancing around a final time before her eyes fell on a door, she dashed towards it, eager to be away from the place. She skidded to a stop almost as soon as she entered the room, greeted by a familiar sight, Cassandra's initial interrogation in the cells at Haven. She walked around the side of the room, trying to blot out the memories of the questioning, as much as she understood the reasons being bound in such a way pained her honour.

The next door opened at her touch, and she found herself in a long hallway, tall statues spewing vicious green liquid that burnt her nose and made her feel sick, she wanted to be away from here, from the acid green colour that polluted her memory of her home, her forest.

Her head was throbbing as she scurried through the room, avoiding the liquid as best she could, though she managed to get some splash up on her back and the searing pain it cause had tears spring to her eyes.

She staggered and leaned heavily against the wall, panting softly as she saw a figure resembling Lord Seeker Lucius run on ahead, laughing manically at her pain. She shook her head and pushed up, seeing no way through the flaming liquid, there was a door to her right however, and she limped towards it cautiously.

Inside the room everything was wrong, tables and chairs were on the walls instead of the floor, and everything made her head hurt more. 

“You're hurting. Helpless. Hasty.” a new voice said suddenly, coming from nowhere it seemed, “What happens to the hammer when there are no more nails?”  
“What are you?! Get out! Get out, this is my place! Mine! Leave now creature!” the cold, watery voice argued from all around her.

Artemis let out an almost silent whimper, wishing for guidance, wishing for someone she really knew to be at her side, “Solas would know what to do...” she shook her head at the petty thought and turned to leave the room.

“Wait.” the newer, fresher, kinder voice reached out again, and for some reason she obeyed, stopping in her tracks and turning around, almost jumping out of her skin as she came face to face with a young boy, a large hat concealing most of his face from her.  
“Who... Are you?” she asked.  
“Envy is hurting you. Mirrors on mirrors on memories... A face it can feel but not fake. I want to help. You, not Envy.” the boy said in the same soft voice.  
“I... I don't understand. Who are you?” she repeated, her courage weakening as she expected more horror stories and nightmares.  
“I have been watching. We are inside you. Me, I mean, you are always inside you. And Envy, he's inside you too... I am Cole.” his voice was uncertain, like he wasn't sure how to explain without scaring her more, “Its... Easy to hear, but harder to become part of what you are hearing. Yet, I am here... Hearing... Helping... Or at least I want to. Envy is hurting you, I can feel it. I tried to help, and I ended up here... Its-Its not usually like this...”

Artemis looked baffled, confused and more than a little uncomfortable, she flinched as she heard an animal like growl from the other side of the door and she swallowed, backing away against the wall a little, “None of this makes sense...” she shook her head and closed her eyes, “I just want to get back to... Whatever was before this... Its hazy...”  
“I was watching. I watch... Always. Every Templar knew when you arrived, and they were... Impressed. But not like the Lord Seeker was. He twisted the commanders, turned their hatred outside... Made them red inside... Red and twisted and darker... Envy is trying to take your face. I heard it, reached out and then I was here... I was trying to help. I want to help.”  
Her eyes narrowed, “You are a spirit... I sense that about you... I do not trust you! I have had enough of spirits and demons already. How can I be sure you are not just one of Envy's helpers?!” she barked.

Artemis turned on her heel to walk out of the room but froze on the spot, her mouth falling open as she saw someone in the doorway, “I... Solas?” she breathed, relief blooming through her chest, “How did you-?”  
“Begone demon!” the other Elf pointed his staff at the spirit, at Cole, “You will not trick her any further.”  
Cole was on his feet, “Do not listen, this is not your friend, not your aid, this is the work of the demon, I am here to help. Not hinder...”  
“How many others have you spun the same lie to, demon, you will leave her mind now, do not return!” Solas stepped forward several paces, staff still raised and aimed at the other.  
“You do not have the power to cast me out, or I would not have been here to begin with. Herald you must not listen to Envy, it is tricking you.”

The elven woman looked between them, her head was thumping like she was being head-butted repeatedly, her whole body was aching like she had run a marathon and all she wanted to was to get home, “Stop it, both of you! For all I know Cole you could be Envy... Solas is powerful, he could have gotten here to save me... You could be a trick... I do not know you, I do not trust you...”

Cole looked frustrated and in a desperate act he lunged towards Solas drawing two curved daggers in his hands; Artemis' eyes widened and she threw herself forward, her staff in her hands she pointed it at Cole and let out a shout of a spell, throwing him backwards with a flash of blinding light; she was dazed for a moment but when she lowered her hands she saw the boy was no longer there, a rippling tear in the wall had formed, but as soon as she saw it, it sealed shut, leaving her alone with Solas.

“Ir abelas...” she whispered, slumping against her staff as she looked over her shoulder at Solas, “Were you hurt?”  
“No, Lethallan, you protected me.” he offered a small smile and walked over to her, “I am glad you knew to trust me, that creature would have been the end of you I am sure.”  
“It... Wanted to take my face... To be me...” she shook her head and shivered at the thought, “But how do we escape Solas? We need to return to the others...”  
The older Elf rested a hand on her shoulder, “I think I may know a way. If we travel to the creature's lair, we can destroy its source, and then we should be expelled from this place, and freed.”  
“Its lair? It made a lair? In my head?” she swallowed hard, “This gets better and better...”  
He chuckled a little at that, “Try not to worry Lethallan, we will escape.”

She relaxed a little at his reassurance and followed him from the room, the green liquid was gone, replaced by clear cool water, which soothed the burn on her back as she walked through it, allowing him to lead her as she grew increasingly tired and weary.

The meandered through courtyards and hallways, similar to those of Therinfal Redoubt, in some cases identical, though she couldn't focus enough to really pin point her location.

Eventually, she couldn't bare to walk any further, her legs buckling and sending her to the floor, her staff clattered at her side as she gasped for breath, feeling too hot for comfort, her skin boiling to the touch and flushed with fever.

“S-Solas... I... I don't... I don't feel...” she hung her head as she struggled to string a sentence together, her eyelids heavy, “I feel so ill... Are we nearly there?”  
“Oh yes, we are nearly there. You have to make yourself get there Lethallan, I cannot carry you.” he mused, his voice a little off.  
“I-I know...” she muttered, trying to push herself back to her feet, but she fell again, “I need a few minutes... I'm so... Tired...”  
“Don't worry, I will go on ahead and see if there is anything I can get to help you.” he told her gently, his voice was still just a little wrong.  
“Be careful...” she muttered, laying down slowly and rolling onto her back, staring up at the grey skies.

It felt like hours, days, that she lay there. Her body was stiff, sore and so sleepy. Her eyes would not close though, she wanted to sleep, and to rest but it was impossible, whenever she closed her eyes they simply opened again with or without consent. As time passed she grew concerned for Solas, wondering what was taking him so long.

Every ounce of her energy went into reaching out to grasp her staff, it pained her like nothing else ever had but she carried on, digging the butt of the wood into the ground and hauling herself up onto her feet, she leaned heavily against it, her eyes half closed as she followed the direction her elven companion had disappeared in. Each footstep was as heavy as lifting a boulder, each jolt and jostle made her body groan in complaint; she was sure she would fall several times but she made herself carry on, she had to find Solas.

She found herself at the bottom of a staircase, the same one she had travelled to in Therinfal Redoubt with her other companions before the Lord Seeker had trapped her, it was the same, and yet different this time. Although everything in her surroundings was coloured monochromatic grey, there was no mistaking the brilliant scarlet of blood running down the stone steps like a river.

Her heart stopped as she followed the trail of blood, her eyes reaching the top of the stairs, her mouth falling open and a scream escaping her as she saw the Lord Seeker holding Solas' severed head in his hand, dropping it and letting it fall down the stairs to greet her, it bumped into her foot and stopped, his cold dead eyes staring up at her.

“No... No!” she exclaimed, her breaths becoming shorter as she stumbled back, dropping her staff to the floor as she looked back up at the Templar. He was gone.

A sudden cry left her lips as she was thrown backwards, her back hitting one of the many statues in the courtyard, she expected to fall but instead she remained pinned there by acid green vines with crawled from the trees, wrapping around her wrists and waist so tightly they dug in and cut her skin.

Artemis let out a groan of pain, struggling against the bonds before, abruptly, the true Envy flew at her, a myriad of legs and talons scratching, clawing, pawing, padding at her, until her armour clattered to the floor below her and she was left in her hide pants and cotton tunic.

Her face was clasped in one of its skeletal hands, her eyes forced to look into its face, tears had welled and spilled over as the last of her composure shattered and she was left alone and afraid with a monster she could not defeat.

“Tell me how you feel.” the creature purred, its voice slick, watering and cold.  
“Alone...” she breathed feebly, “And I am afraid...”  
“Tell me why you are alone. Why you are afraid.”  
Her breath hitched, “Because... I couldn't save my friend... I couldn't save anybody...”  
“Are you worthless?”  
“Yes...” she breathed.  
“You deserve this, don't you?” it hissed.  
“Yes... I deserve this...” she felt her mouth go dry as the last of her energy ebbed away, her head lolling a little in the creature's grasp.  
“Tell me... How can you be the Herald of Andraste, when you cannot even protect your friends?”  
“How... Can I be the Herald of Andraste... When I cannot... Even protect my friends...” she let out a weak sob as she repeated his words, her palm burning where the mark had scarred her skin.  
“They deserve someone stronger.”  
“They do... They deserve a leader...”  
“You are not that leader.”  
“No... No I am not...” she felt her head spin before everything went dark.

Envy released its hold on her head and slowly pressed its fingers against her temples, it was going to take every memory, ever response, every feeling and make them its own. They would bleed her dry.

* * *

Cole was flung backwards, he felt himself collide with something warm and squishy and they toppled to the floor together, he lifted his gaze slowly and scooted back as swiftly as he could, looking into the unimpressed eyes of a familiar bald elf.

“You!” he exclaimed.  
“Excuse me?” Solas picked himself up slowly and looked down at the boy before he looked around, his eyes narrowing as he saw everyone else was almost 'frozen' and unmoving, “What have you done?” he demanded.  
“I helped. Or tried to. It didn't work like it normally does... Things happened. Went wrong... Envy was too strong. Took your face. Made her believe I was the enemy...” Cole replied folding his arms uncertainly.  
“Envy... Then I was correct, I had hoped my senses were wrong.” he looked towards the frozen Inquisitor and Lord Seeker, “What is he doing to her?”  
“Trying to take her face. To become her. I tried to help, tried to stop it, but Envy is clever, trickster... Took your face, the face of someone she knows and trusts... Manipulating her.”  
“You are no ordinary spirit are you? Don't answer that, we have not got time for my curiosity. Can you get back into her mind?”  
“Yes but it would be difficult, Envy will be watching out for me this time. Won't want me to interfere again...” he murmured, sitting on the wall in an awkward fashion.  
Solas tightened his grip on is staff, “Don't worry about that. I will handle Envy.”


	3. The Keeper Kept

Cole moved slowly, standing beside the Herald he looked into her misted eyes, his own searching deep for something, a latch; a key; a door; an entrance. Solas stood back and observed, his inner rage bubbling at the mere inkling of what Envy might be doing to her inside her mind, and with his face too, what if she never trusted him again? He shook off his concerns and approached as the younger man gestured to him.

 

“I can get us in... But it will be tricky... Dangerous... It might go wrong...” the blond said slowly, his eyes never leaving Artemis'.

“I am willing to take the risk, she cannot be left in there to suffer.”

“Mm, I think so too...” he muttered, taking a long breath before he reached up and rested a hand on Solas's forehead, and one on the forehead of the Herald, “Take a deep breath... Don't trust your eyes...”

“Do it.” the Elf murmured, inhaling as he was told.

 

The sensation of being pulled underwater flooded his every sense, the urge to gasp for breath and surface gripping him as his legs grew weak and heavy, his ears filling with a dull muted sound like water gushing in and muffling nature's orchestra; his heart hammered against his ribs, his blood pumping faster and harder with the need to continue thrusting oxygen around his body. His limbs grew weak, almost like they were detached from his body and despite the urge to gasp in another great breath he was completely paralysed, he couldn't move, couldn't see, couldn't breathe.

 

Solas had never experienced such sensations in his life, his journeys into the Fade had on occasion been uncomfortable but this was on a completely fresh level beyond his comprehension. When he thought it could get no worse, a voice trickled into his mind like blood from a paper cut.

 

“Stop fighting... Fighting makes it harder... You need to relax... Accept what you are feeling...” it was Cole's voice, as clear as daylight in his mind, it became his anchor, he reached out for the voice, reaching through the haze of water before a blinding light shone through even his closed lids.

 

A gasp left the Elf as he staggered, stumbling into a stone pillar and coughing hard, expecting to be drenched and spewing water but instead he was utterly dry and nothing by air left his lips, taking a moment to gather is bearings Solas slowly raised his head, finding himself in a woodland scene, a frown meeting his gaze before he saw Cole up ahead.

 

“Where are we?” he asked, his voice a little hoarse as he stalked over.

The blond looked somewhat confused as he appraised their surroundings, “Mm... We must be a little off... I was sure I had found where and when she needed help... Maybe Envy set up a block to stop me...” he fiddled restlessly with the brim of his large hat.

“What do you mean?”

“Its like a clock that is working too fast, its arms are spinning around without a pause... I have to reach in and grab them at the right second, the right minute... But its hard, you can't quite see it clearly, like looking through glass or smoke... If you go at the wrong time you could end up in a completely different memory... And then that wouldn't be very helpful at all!” he huffed a little in frustration, “I was sure... I know I had the right time... I had the right one... Envy must have sensed us coming, made the arms spin faster... Just to throw us off a little... But he's busy with the Herald... So he can't use too much power...”

Solas observed the young man curiously, mostly understanding his explanation but confused as to the nature of the spirit in front of him, “Is there a way to get to the Herald?”

“Oh yes.” he nodded, “Find a way around Envy... A way he cannot see... Like rabbits burrowing a new den so the fox can't catch them... This way...”

 

With no alternative, he followed the blond through the woods, meandering through the velvety green mist which hazed around their knees like a mysterious cape, once or twice Solas believed he saw the red-headed elven Herald dancing between the trees, but when he tried to look properly she was gone. He recalled what Cole had said about not trusting his eyes, but it was incredibly hard to imagine that all of this was inside one woman's head.

 

“Are we in her memories?” he asked as they passed a magnificent elven ruin recaptured by nature's grasp of leaves and vines.

“Yes, but no too... Like an imprint of a memory shaped by opinion and desire... False memory...”

“So these are places she has visited, but warped to her own sanctuary?”

“That... Sounds right...” he nodded slightly, touching the thick moss on the wall as they passed, “It seems real, feels real, but its like a dream... Not everything is right...”

“She told me she missed the forests, when she was with her clan that is where they would dwell most of the time...” he looked up at the vast green canopy above their heads, “It makes sense she would return here in her thoughts. A small piece of heaven in a world gone mad.”

“Shh!” Cole appeared in his face and cupped a hand over his mouth, “Do not say the 'm' word here! Not with Envy so close... he's contained to her most recent thoughts, most recent memories, but letting him in would be bad, open too many doors and they can't be shut again!” he was looking around like he expected insanity to sweep down upon them, “Envy and Fear are friends, when they work together they drive people to... Extremes...” he whispered, “Don't let them in, no no no, don't let them in.”

Solas was startled at first, but came to understand his reasoning quickly, he too glanced around, resting a hand on Cole's shoulder, “Very well, we should hurry then. We don't want to linger too long.”

“Yes... Yes, yes, don't linger. Leaves too many footprints where there should not be any.” he nodded eagerly and scuttled off again, leaving Solas to follow.

 

The daylight faded faster than in the real world, and as the sun set the stars illuminated the ever darkening sky, a thousand tiny promises guiding them with starlight, and moonlight, showing them new paths, new thoughts and new memories.

 

The pair came to a stop at the bank of a large lake, surrounded by fresh rich earth; green crisp grass; and walls off flower shrouded bushes. The lake was black in the night but the pale light of the celestial stars illuminated each ripple, each tiny quiver of water giving way to tendrils of pure white light.

 

The elven man felt an aura of peace and tranquillity blanket him, like a warm robe falling over his shoulders to settle him into an armchair by a fire. Even in the Fade he had never encountered such a feeling. There was something unexpectedly beautiful about walking the memories of another, walking in the ready made paths of another soul, another spirit.

 

From the corner of his eye he thought he saw Lavellan again, waist deep in the water with her back to them, her auburn hair much longer than it was currently. She was performing some ancient Dalish rite, praise to the old gods to welcome her into adulthood. He recognised the rite well, it was performed the night before receiving Vallaslin when a maturing Elf would meditate to the old gods, hoping to be found worthy of adulthood.

 

“Bare-faced, embarrassed, not yet a woman but no longer a child...” Cole said softly, apparently he too could see her this time, “Nervous, scared of the pain, wanting to impress, make proud...”

“Shame on the Dalish for imposing such rules on their young, to make them ponder the meaning of adulthood... Vallaslin does not make you an adult...” Solas shook his head and turned away slowly, “Let us move on.”

“Angry, shame, disappointment... You understand what they do not but you have not shared it, cannot share it...”

“Stop.” Solas warned once, silencing Cole as they began walking again.

 

The imagine of her ritual was burned into his mind, unshakable and unforgettable, he wondered what her face would have looked like without the Vallaslin, what she would look like now without it. He scolded himself for such impulsive thoughts, for truly what she looked like was none of his business, though he looked back only once in time to see her lithe figure fade into mist.

 

Their path grew steep as they continued through the night, using gnarled roots and branches to help them climb, ascending the hill until finally they rose above the haze and emerged back onto level ground, finding themselves to be walking among the intricate simplicity of Dalish aravels.

 

The chatter of the Elves was whispered, gentle, mournful, and as the pair approached two freshly planted trees they learned why it was so.

“Mala suldein nadas, Da'len. Your parents embark on din'anshiral, ir abelas, their loss has hit us all greatly.” and elderly Elven woman approached with a Herald who looked very much alike the version of her Solas was used to.

“What did she say?” Cole asked, leaning towards Solas a little, clearly confused by the mixed use of Elven and human languages.

“She said, 'now you must endure, little one. Your parents embark on a journey of death, I am sorry, their death has hit us all greatly'.” he translated with ease, his gaze ever leaving Lavellan's lithe form, “This must be the funeral of her mother and father, I had no idea she lost them both at the same time.” he added in a low voice.

The older Elven woman spoke again, “Da'len, I know this is a hard time for you, it is hard on us all. The loss of Keeper is a traumatic event for all clans, even more so when one is your parent. It has been a week now since we saw them return to the Creators, back to the bosom of our beginnings. I need to know if you... If you are going to take up your father's mantle.”

Lavellan looked at the two trees for several silent moments before taking in a deep breath, thumbing a rosewood ring on her finger, “It is what he would want me to do, Hahren. I cannot deny him him dying wish. I just... I hope I am what the clan needs, I hope I am able to give them what they need. He left... A large gap in all our lives, I do not know if I can fill it.”

“We do not expect you to take over immediately, Da'len, in knowing you will accept the position we have time now to complete your training, I can hold the position until you are ready.” the older Elf said soothingly, rubbing the younger one's back.

“Thank you, I would truly be lost without the support of the clan.” the Herald whispered, embracing the other gently before she stepped back and took a breath, “I will do it, as soon as I have finished my training... And once this foolish Conclave is out of the way.”

 

Solas's breath caught in his chest, Lavellan was the daughter of a Keeper, and she was meant to be a Keeper herself? There was far more to this Dalish woman than he had even imagined. His interest piqued further at the mention of the Conclave, undoubtedly the one in which all of this had begun.

 

“Are you sure you must be the one to go, Da'len? Would it not be easier to send one of our hunters in your place? If you are discovered... Or should something happen...” the older Elf began to protest but the Herald gestured for her silence.

“It must be me. We are here talking about how I need to begin stepping up to my responsibilities to the clan, Hahren... If I shrug off this task now what example does that set? No... It must be me. I will attend this... Temple of Sacred Ashes and hear what the Shem's holy leader has to say. It may affect us, we must know and I am best suited to the task.” she smiled faintly and glanced at the trees a final time, “I owe it to them to do my very best.”

“I understand, Da'len... Please be careful. Go with Mythal's blessings.”

 

Lavellan was left alone, and a soft whisper left her lips, “Hahren na melana sahlin, emma ir abelas, souver'inan isala hamin, vhenan him dor'felas, in uthenera na revas, vir sulahn'nehn, vir dirthera, vir samahl la numin, vir lath sa'vunin.” she let out a soft dry sob, “Ar lasa mala revas.”

 

The memory faded before them and they were left with a clear path to continue onwards through the memory-woodland to their goal; Solas found himself continuing with a far heavier heart then before. There was so much the Inquisition did not know about their Herald, so much they did not care to ask about. 

 

“What did the Herald say at the end? I-I was listening but I couldn't hear it... Elvish is... I don't understand it.” Cole admitted as they walked, a frown on his face, hidden under his hat as he kept a lookout for Envy's traps.

“T'was a Dalish eulogy, once it was dedicated to those undergoing the Uthenera, the long sleep of the immortal Elves. But... As they are no longer immortal it is now used to mourn those lost. I shall not translate it, it was a private, intimate moment we should not have been privy to. I feel it would be an insult to share it further.” Solas replied honestly, his eyes narrowing as he saw a change of scenery ahead of them, Cole said nothing of his refusal, apparently respecting that decision.

 

The change of scene was promising, it opened up into the familiar stone layout of Therinfal Redoubt, it appeared they had seen their fill of the Herald's inner thoughts and were now free of Envy's influence, free to continue forward and save the Herald of Andraste.

 

“Keep your senses sharp, I doubt it will be long before the creature discovers we have moved closer again.” he murmured, his grip tightening on his staff as he took firm, confident steps onwards, sensing the looming darkness of Envy's presence ahead of them still, as well as the waning strength of a light. Artemis' light.

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for reading, I hope this was enjoyable for you, please leave a comment to let me know of improvements or suggestions, more chapters to come ASAP.


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